Welcome to TNC

TheNaughtyChick is an erotic ezine/blog for women. TNC's purpose is to aid, inform, amuse, entertain and arouse readers.

The content is intended for mature audiences only. Those under the age of 18 need to leave now.

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Fight for the Cure




June 21, 2007  

John Barrowman = Kinky  

John Barrowman, star of the BBC's Torchwood and Doctor Who, recently discussed his sexuality and his fan base:

John Barrowman says he should consider turning straight because he's so popular with the ladies.

The actor, who's just finished a stint as a judge on Any Dream Will Do, reckons he's a babe magnet.

'I don't get attention from men - it's all women. They try to turn me,' he laughs. 'I'm considering coming out as straight, because if I was into p***y I would be getting so much right now!

'That's my tip to straight lads - pretend you're gay, then the girls want to turn you!'

But the 40-year-old star, who's been dating British designer Scott Gill for six years, can still appreciate a woman's beauty - particularly Dr Who co-star Freema Agyeman.

'She has a nice butt,' he tells Zoo magazine. 'I may be gay, but I appreciate t**s and ass. Nothing beats a good titty-w**k.' (Source)


Yes, he is correct: he is hot and the fan girls love him. Let the Tennant-Barrowman porn fantasies begin!

Captain Jack Harkness 

June 20, 2007  

Jessica Alba = Kinky  

Jessica Alba is kinky. And she doesn't mind saying it. Good for her.
Fantastic Four star Jessica Alba claims she doesn't expect a relationship with someone just because she has slept with them.

She told America's Cosmopolitan magazine: "I just wanted to see what it was like to be with different people. I don't think a girl's a slut if she enjoys sex.

"I could have a one-night stand, and I'm the kind of girl who looks over in the morning and is like, 'Do you really have to be here?' I don't need to cuddle and do all that stuff because I know what it is and I don't try to make it more."  (Source)

And a collective scream of joy was heard from men around the globe.

Jessica Alba 

June 15, 2007  

Kevin Smith's Porn Flick  

Kevin Smith, of Clerks and Dogma fame, got the greenlight to make his movie after only writing six words of the script.

What were the words? The title: "Zack and Miri Make a Porno."
"A bawdy sex comedy with heart," as Smith describes the just-completed script, "Zack and Miri" is about two friends who have managed to trudge into their 30s with a satisfying lack of accomplishment. But a 15-year high school reunion and dire rent problems spark the novel moneymaking idea of pulling together an amateur porn enterprise. As for where it goes from there, just think of Smith's characteristic sexual verbosity finally coupled with matching imagery. (Source)

Jay & Silent Bob

June 14, 2007  

Madonna + JKFJr.  

File this story under "too much information"....

It seems Madonna's sexcapades are coming back to haunt her. The singing sex diva of the eighties and nineties is now believed to have almost had sex with John F Kennedy Jr. but they stopped because they did not have a condom!

According to a US website, Rob is reported to have said, "Madonna and John were working their way around the bases, and as they rounded third and headed for home, she asked him if he had any protection. He didn't, so now they began discussing how they were going to get a hold of a prophylactic. She was still legally married to Sean Penn, and John had a steady girlfriend... They were afraid of being busted.

They couldn't very well just meander into a pharmacy and ask for a pack of Trojans. They were too well known... To John's great chagrin, the relationship was never completed." Madonna subsequently went on to separate from Sean at the end of 1988 and the couple divorced the following year. John, who US society magazines described as a political playboy, married Carolyn Bessette in September 1996, but the pair died in a tragic plane crash in July 1999. Madonna, 48, is now married to British film director Guy Ritchie. The diva doesn't shock anymore, but she is making a comeback with her music. (Source)

Is anyone else grossed out by the idea of sex with Madonna?


June 13, 2007  

JT = NOT Kinky  

Confession: It wasn't until last summer that I could look at Justin Timberlake and think he was sexy without feeling like a cradle robber.

The 'Sexy Back' singer admits he doesn't feel comfortable stripping off in front of the camera and thinks shooting love scenes is the worst part of acting.

Justin, 26, said: "The sex scene was pretty hot. I'm not going to say it doesn't feel weird pretending to f**k someone in front of a man with a sound boom, though."

The article continues to talk about JT's nervousness about having his nekkid arse on film. He spoke to the director and the scenes were cut. (Source)

Say it with me ladies: Dammit!

JT 

June 7, 2007  

Angie [heart] Nekkid  

Yeah, I know. Call Ripley, because he will never believe this one: Angelina Jolie likes to be nude.
In a magazine interview the Hollywood actress confessed that she talks a lot in the bath and finds it easier to open up when she has no clothes on.

The 32-year-old has said in the past that she isn't opposed to nude scenes in films, but has admitted that the large amount of tattoos on her body has made it hard to cover them all up. (Source)
The article continues to state that Brangelina is not breaking up anytime soon. They are currently doing the "Ocean's Thirteen" premiere tour and they are looking smashing, smart and happy.

In other news, I saw on the newsstand last night that Jennifer Aniston is has signed a deal for a five million dollar tell-all book. Looks like someone is having trouble moving on with life. Captain Obvious tag explodes.

Brangelina

Paris > Britney & TomKat  

Surfing the net in search of nude pictures of Britney Spears may be more dangerous than nude pictures of Paris Hilton. No, not dangerous to you, dangerous to your PC. Sites offering such content are more likely to infect your PC with a virus.

Go ahead. Insert your own skank joke here.
The finding has been based on a study conducted by McAfee's SiteAdvisor group, which evaluates the risks associated with approximately 2,300 of the most popular search terms based on the sites they return.

According to the online search conducted, McAfee found that searching for Britney in the buff can put you at risk of coming across a very high percentage of sites riddled with spyware and other malicious code than a search for a naked Paris Hilton.

However, more dangerous in this category than Paris, was found to be Celeb couple Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. (Source)
The last bit about TomKat is pure comedy gold. You can't make this stuff up kids.

Britney is Toxic

May 31, 2007  

Beth Ditto = Nekkid  

Beth Ditto, supersize lead singer of the indie band The Gossip, has recently bared all for the cover of NME, a music magazine. As almost everything with Ditto, this was done to make a "statement":
The lead singer of 'The Gossip' used the opportunity to blame gay fashionistas, Paris Hilton and the Beckhams for the size zero weight crisis.

Telling NME magazine, she said: 'If there's anyone to blame for size zero, it's not women.'

'Blame gay men who work in the fashion industry who want these women as dolls.' (Source)
I don't mean to be snarky - perhaps it is PMS. But every time I hear about this woman it is because of some "statement" she is making, rather than about her band's music (which, in all fairness, is pretty good). I dunno - just seems like, as a musician, she would want to be known for the music she creates with her mouth rather than the noise?

Beth Ditto

May 30, 2007  

Simon Cowell = Kinky  

Simon Cowell's sex life has recently been exposed. And he is not exactly thrilled, as you can imagine:
Simon's fellow 'American Idol' judge Paula Abdul joked about the music mogul's performance in the bedroom while recording her contribution for the episode of British show 'This Is Your Life.'

Paula, 44, quipped, "Simon is an egomaniac. He's the only man I know who screams his own name when having sex. And his idea of foreplay is staring at himself in the mirror."

The incident was made even more embarrassing for Simon, 47, as Paula made the comments in front of an audience including his 80-year-old mother Julie.

Simon's older brother Tony, 55, also let slip the music mogul would wear make-up to feign illness to get out of going to school.

He said, "He used to wear pale make-up to look ill so he could get out of going to school." (Source)
Simon


Mick the Dick  

This is just weird. While in the Amazon jungle, Sir Mick Jagger was allegedly a participant in some sort of native marriage ritual which involved him putting his penis in a hollow bamboo stalk that was filled with stinger bees. Apparently the idea was that, in allowing the bees to sting the penis, then the member would attain the size of the bamboo. (Source)

Um, ouch?

In other news, do we really want to think that closely about Mick [the Dick] Jagger's penis? 

Sir Mick the Dick

May 23, 2007  

Katee Holmes Porn  

No, not THAT Katie Holmes...just a wanna-be porn star who is trying to capitalize on her name and fame:
A blond-haired, blue-eyed fashion student, who claims to be a virgin, has changed her name to Katee Holmes and is launching a porn career in which she'll be deflowered in her first movie. And that's got the real Katie Holmes' camp in an uproar.
"It's a really cheap shot," a rep for the actress, who's married to Tom Cruise, told Page Six. But Shy Love, an adult film vet who manages the 5-foot-9, 122-pound Katee - a small-town girl from Illinois - insisted: "Katee is using the name as a tribute to Katie, who has always portrayed an innocence in everything she's done, beginning with 'Dawson's Creek.' "

Well, not quite everything - Holmes did go topless in the 2000 movie "The Gift," but she's shunned any on-screen nudity since tying the knot with Cruise, who's believed to have gotten her sex scene with Aaron Eckhart killed from "Thank You for Smoking."

Katee, 18 - a student at the Fashion Institute of Design in Orange County, Calif. - has no such qualms. She wrote to Shy Love, who runs Adult Talent Managers and has a Myspace profile, and the two discussed having her "first" sexual encounter filmed.

"I know it's pretty extreme to lose my virginity on camera, but I like the fulfillment and excitement I get from watching porn, so I figured [a movie] was the best place for me to lose it," the not-that-innocent Katee said. "How many people wished they could relive their first experience, if not to remember it but to learn from it, right?"

Love said she'll start slow with her improbable virgin, having Katee try a girl/girl encounter first. "She comes to the porn world completely natural - with a perky pair of A-cup breasts that are far too perfect to have been constructed by any doctor. And she's not just a porn virgin, but an actual never-been-kissed virgin," Love gushed.

Holmes' camp is weighing her possible recourse. A friend of Katie told us, "It's really kind of sleazy, using her name like that."

A spokeswoman for Cruise said, "Obviously, Tom would support Katie in anything she decides to do about it." (Source)
The REAL Katie Holmes

May 19, 2007  

Christina Ricci = Kinky  

Christina Ricci is comfortable being naked.

Most actress hate playing nude scenes, but the “Black Snake Moan” star stayed without her clothes on during most of the shoot, refusing to put on them on even when the camera wasn’t rolling.

“I didn’t cover up between shots because I had to get used to being like that and get into the way (my character) was thinking,” Ricci told the London Mirror. “It didn’t matter to her whether she had clothes on or not, so I needed to lose any self-conscious affectations.” (Source)

Verdict: Christina Ricci is kinky. Click the image below to see more of Christina. 

Click here for FREE photo gallery 

May 18, 2007  

Blake Lewis = NOT Hot  

Must to the disgust of NaughtyBoyfriend, I, like much of the country, have been religiously watching the American Idol [trainwreck] Season Six. Much as it may dismay the any fangirls who might be reading, and as much as they might like to crucify me for being honest, I feel as if I must get something off my chest:

Blake Lewis is NOT hot.

Aside from the fact that he cannot sing in any proper key, aside from the fact that he insists on interjecting that ridiculously idiotic beatboxing in every song he sings, and aside from the fact that his [so-called] sense of style is nothing more than a headache-inducing mess of clashing patterns and designs, Blake Lewis is not a physically attractive person.

He has no lips. I am aware that Melinda Doolittle's presence on the show, and the no-neck Shrek jokes she inspired, distracted from this fact. However, it is undeniable that Lewis is without proper appendages to frame his mouth. Hence I find the female huhbub about this guy rather amusing - what the hell do these girls think they are going to kiss? Frankly, my uncles chickens have a better chance at lip lock.

His peach fuzz makes him appear as a muppet. Some men can pull off the stubble look with intensely-successful results: Matthew Fox, Justin Timberlake, David Beckham. Hell, even the Geico Caveman looks better. Blake Lewis's attempt at the scruffy look only makes him appear, well, scruffy - like he has a blond blanket over his chin.

Lastly, the most unattractive feature about Blake Lewis is his tongue. You know - the one he can barely keep in his mouth as he butchers one song after another [maybe the lack of lips contribute to this problem]. His tongue looks like a big, sloppy, corse mess and I would bet my vibrator that he has no idea what to do with it. Blake strikes me as the sort of lover that would just randomly, and without practiced technique, stick his tongue anywhere, slobber and lap, and assume that he has given a woman pleasure.

Therefore, I conclude that Blake Lewis is NOT hot. I realize one's appearance has little to do with singing ability - one can be decidedly un-hot and be a fantastic singer [see Elliot Yamin].  But since Blake possesses no singing ability, that point is null. I realize that American Idol is not a talent competition, but a popularity contest, and this is what has inspired me to write this public service announcement in order to educate the "BlakerGirls" that insist on treating the boi as if he is Elvis. Blake Lewis cannot sing and he is not hot, hence there is no reason to continue to allow him public attention. Vote Jordin Sparks for this year's American Idol - we do not need another Vanilla Ice unleashed on this country's radio waves.

Blake Lewis  Vanilla Ice

May 14, 2007  

Spock = Kinky AND Cool  

Everyone knows Lenoard Nimoy as Dr. Spock. What most people don't know is that Nimoy is also an accomplished photographer. For his latest exhibition and book, Nimoy has put together a series of photographs featuring plus-sized women.

He knows that he is an unlikely champion for the size-acceptance movement; body image is a topic he never really thought about before. But for the last eight years, Mr. Nimoy, who is 76 and an established photographer, has been snapping pictures of plus-size women in all their naked glory.

“The average American woman, according to articles I’ve read, weighs 25 percent more than the models who are showing the clothes they are being sold,” Mr. Nimoy said, his breathing slightly labored by allergies and a mild case of emphysema. “So, most women will not be able to look like those models. But they’re being presented with clothes, cosmetics, surgery, diet pills, diet programs, therapy, with the idea that they can aspire to look like those people. It’s a big, big industry. Billions of dollars. And the cruelest part of it is that these women are being told, ‘You don’t look right.’ ”

Read the entire article here. All hail Spock!

Spock! 

May 12, 2007  

Eva Longoria = Pretend NOT Kinky  

Eva Longoria is uncomfortable with her Desperate Housewives character constantly being scripted in lingerie and in the bath tub.
“Filming is nerve-wracking, I’m constantly worrying about how I’m being filmed.”

“I had to talk to creator Marc Cherry and go: ‘Can you please stop putting me in the bath tub?’” (Source)

I am tempted to make a joke here, considering this woman discusses orgasms and brazilian waxes during magazine interviews, but I will hold my tongue. Don't want to appear a total snarky, bitch [anymore than I already do, that is].

In other news, Eva has imposed a sex ban on her basketball player finace Tony Parker until the two exchange vows in June. The actress claims the sex ban has been implemented in order to help Tony remain focused and full of energy during the NBA basketball playoffs.

Bummer.  I am guessing that Tony will miss viewing the tattoo of his initials that is located on some unnamed intimate region of Eva's body (yes, she told that to the press, too).

Verdict? Eva is kinky. She just doesn't want us to think she is.

Eva Longoria 

May 11, 2007  

Hugh Jackman  

OMG. My prayers have been answered. I pleased to present to you a naughty gallery of Hugh Jackman. This guy sings, dances, plays piano, wear claws and has a hot accent. What more could a girl ask for?

To see more of Hugh [read: all of Hugh], click the image below. Happy Friday!

Click here to see Hugh Jackman gallery



Xtina = Nekkid Sundays  

"Dirty" is obviously not just a nickname with Christina Aguilera. She recently told Cosmopolitan magazine that she and her husband set aside one day a week for intimate activities:
"We have naked Sundays. You just lie in bed all day and chill with each other and do things that husbands and wives do. We love our cosiness."

The singer also divulged that she and Jordan, 29, cook together to help keep the closeness in their marriage. The couple's joint speciality dish is spicy Mexican tacos. Christina said: "We have our taco night. He cooks the meat and I chop the tomatoes and the lettuce. It's important to take time for your spouse and nurture the relationship."

The 'Aint No Other Man' singer, who has been married for almost a year, insists she and her spouse always devote a day to enjoying each other's bodies. (Source)

Say what you want about Christina, but I think she is very wise to put aside bonding time for her spouse. I kinda like the idea of nekkid Sundays - I shall have to raise the issue with NaughtyBoyfriend.

Xtina 

May 10, 2007  

Brad Pitt = NOT Kinky  

Brad Pitt is refusing to bare his nude bottom for his latest movie, causing the film's producers to put out casting calls for a suitable bottom double:
The hunky actor -- who is filming nude scenes for "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" -- showed off his naked behind in the 2004 film "Troy," but is reportedly refusing to go nude in "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" reports Sfgate.com

Gossips believe Angelina Jolie might have something to do with his decision.  (Source)

And a collective scream of despair was heard from women around the world.

Brad Pitt 

May 9, 2007  

Pam Anderson = Embarrassment  

Captain Obvious would like to bring you the following public service announcement: Pam Anderson is an embarrassment to her children. 

The former Baywatch star has revealed her son Brandon, 10, was dismayed when he saw his mum virtually naked on the front cover of her novel Star.

Pammie said: "When my son Brandon saw my book cover he said, 'Is anybody going to see that? It's so embarrassing'."

She explained: "I can't stand pictures of myself because I'm much better looking in my mind. I see pictures and go, that's not me." (Source)

Go ahead. You can roll your eyes. I did. I think that "much better looking in my mind" comment earned a spot on my "Top Ten People That Need To Go Away" list...somewhere between Paris Hilton and Tom Cruise.

Embarrassment 

 

May 7, 2007  

Who-gasm  

David Tennant,, the smokin' hottie currently reigning as BBC's Doctor Who, has recently confessed that his most embarrassing on-camera moment was faking an orgasm for a film:
The actor, 36, told tonight’s Parkinson show: “Pretending to climax on screen is about the most embarrassing thing I have ever done.

“It was in a film once quite a long time ago. It’s only because it’s a relatively private experience, let’s be honest.

“There are all these cameras and everyone else watching you and you go for it as best as you can.

“It’s not pretending to have sex that is embarrassing. Hopefully you’re with an actress and you’re in the same boat and you are just getting on with it.” (Source)

I would not expect someone who's nickname is "David TenInch" to be embarrassed about anything sexual.

By the way, if you haven't seen the newer episodes of Doctor Who, find a way to watch now (SciFi Channel or BBC America). David Tennnant is one of the sexiest things on the planet: lean, cute, hot accent, great hair, sexy as hell, and he wears kilts. Observe Who-gasm below. I rest my case.

Daivd TenInch 

May 6, 2007  

Keira Knightly  

With Pirates of the Caribbean: End of the World right around the corner, I thought now might be a good time to feature one of my favorite female celebs, Keira Knightly.

I have no idea why I find this girl so hot: she really is a beanpole tomboy, but there is something about her that I just find fascinating and alluring. And, as I have recently read, she is quite a kinky little minx.

So anyway, click the image below to see more [read: boobies] of Keira. Many thanks to our affiliate FemaleCelebs.com!

Kinky Keira

 

 

May 4, 2007  

Britney = Flower Child  

Britney Spears is apparently getting into the spirit of World Naked Gardening Day a bit early. Photos have surfaced of the pop singer posing naked in a friend's garden with only a couple of flowers to cover her topside naughty bits.

Britney = Nekkid Gardening
 

May 3, 2007  

Lucky Eric Bana  

Since the romantic comedy Lucky You, co-starring Drew Barrymore, opens this weekend, I thought now would be a nice time to feature Eric Bana as our Yummy Celeb Picgasm for the day. According to RottenTomatoes.com, the movie is not that great. But when your male lead looks like this, does anyone really care about the plot?

If you want to see more of Eric [read: much more], then click the phtoto cluster below. Many thanks to our lovely affiliate MaleCelebrities.com!

Lucky Eric Bana 

May 1, 2007  

Sexy Spidey  

With the release of Spiderman 3 right around the corner, I thought it would be appropriate to feature Tobey Maguire as our first-ever Yummy Celeb Picgasm. Click the photo below to see more [read: much more] of our favorite man in tights. Many thanks to our lovely affiliate MaleCelebrities.com!

Picgasm: Tobey Maguire

Do you really want to hurt me?  

I guess he was serious.

Boy George, former lead singers of the 80s pop band Culture Club, was arrested Saturday upon allegations that he kidnapped and beat a male escort.

The victim, Auden Carlsen, claims:
...he was grabbed by the singer and another man and chained to a wall after the star invited him to his pad in Shoreditch, East London, to pose for photos.

Carlsen revealed he met George on the Gaydar website, but only agreed to go to his flat at midnight as a £400 photographic model and not as an escort.

Carlsen said: “George said he was popping out for milk at 5am. I heard him come back and I walked into his bedroom wearing just my white underpants and a T-shirt. I was jumped on by George and another man.

“George handcuffed me to a hook by the bed as they held me down.”

He said George got rid of the blond man then produced a box of whips and sex toys — telling him: “Now you’ll get what you deserve.”

Carlsen pulled the hook from the wall and fled — then alerted the police from a nearby newsagent’s at 6.30am on Saturday. [Source]

Embarrassing confession of the day: when I was young, I did not realize that Boy George was actually a man. I was such a sheltered child. Yes, you may point and laugh now.

In other news, the years have not been kind to ole Georgie boy:

Boy George - Young  Boy George - Old

 

Pixelated Penis  

According to this article, Bart Simpson will reportedly go full frontal in his upcoming feature film.
According to Newsweek, which got a sneak peek at The Simpsons Movie, "little Bart flashes his little part to the entire world" while skateboarding sans clothing on a dare from dad Homer.

And according to The Simpsons Archive, the show has aired more than 200 different scenes of implied or pixilated nudity and sexual situations during its nearly two-decade run.
I read a rumor somewhere that a bunch of parents are pissed off and want an "R" rating on account of the pixelated penis, but was unable to find any [somewhat] credible news source that stated as such. Is Bart's cartoon crotch worth an adult rating? What do you think?
 
Bart Simpson 

April 30, 2007  

Harry = NOT Hairy  

Daniel Radcliffe, the actor best known for his role in the Harry Potter films, as seen in the stage production Equus.

 

April 27, 2007  

Keira Knightly is Kinky  

Pirates of the Carribbean star Keira Knightly is apparently not as sweet as you may think. Firstly, she claims that she enjoys nude sex scenes:
"Sex scenes are easy. I don't really have a problem with them.

"Actually it was quite liberating in the movie Domino to be out in the middle of the desert completely topless with a beautiful Venezuelan guy. I was very lucky." (Source)

But wait! It gets better! Keira is slated to appear in the upcoming Bob Dylan biopic, “The Best Time of Our Lives,” which features a lesbian threesome. Who is the lucky lady who will receive Keira's affections? Sienna Miller. (Source)

Did you hear that? That is the collective WOOT! from men (and some women) across the globe.

 

Scary Spice Likes Girls  

Melanie Brown, formerly known as "Scary Spice", from the 90s hit British pop group Spice Girls, is the latest celeb who's closet has unearthed a lesbian skeleton:

A friend of the 31-year-old said she was seduced by the singer after a late night drinking session, it was reported.

Christa Parker told Closer magazine: 'We had drunk quite a lot and it was late, so Mel suggested I stay over.'

'Mel started complaining that she hadn't had sex for a while and was feeling horny. Mel said she needed sex and asked me if I wanted to.'

'I'd had a bit to drink and said yes.' 

Source 

In other news, Scary Spice just gave birth to a lovely little girl, who's alleged babby-daddy, Eddie Murphy, denies and refuses to see. Boo! Hiss! 

Scary Spice 

December 5, 2006  

I swear I must have read this wrong...  

...but after several re-reads and a shot of caffeine, I realized that this was the nekkid truth:

Simon Cowell, the grouchy British judge from American Idol, has just topped a British poll of men that women fantasize about while in bed with their partners.



Upon hearing of the results, Cowell was quoted as saying the following:

“I would expect to be very near the top as I’m obviously extremely attractive. I am interested to know where Louis Walsh came. Was he even in the top 100,000 or didn’t they include the over-70s?”

The rest of the top ten were: 3 Jesse Metcalfe, 4 David Beckham, 5 Brad Pitt, 6 Mark Owen, 7 Leonardo DiCaprio, 8 Richard Madeley, 9 Robbie Williams and 10 Will Young.

Sure. I am going to fantasize about that bloke up there before Becks, Pitt and Leo and the hot lawn boy from Desperate Housewives. Captain Obvious is too disgusted to even show up for this post.

Pussygate & Feminism  

Unless you have been living under a rock, you have heard about Britney Spears' latest publicity-seeking habit of forgetting to put on underwear. Several times over the last week, Spears has been photographed by the paparazzi wearing short-short skirts, entering and exiting automobiles, with her naughty bits hanging out. Her antics has created a hell storm of controversy: female and male fans have proclaimed to "be done with her", mothers are worried about her status as a role-model for their daughters, and most recently, a gynecologist wrote an article expressing concern that Britney's unclothed vaginal discharge may be unhygienic to those around her.

But wait, it gets even better: last night I read a commentary published on Animated Shorts, which expressed outrage at the public outrage. Specifically, this author states:
They want her to put her underpants back on! When did this dangerous genetic mutation creep into the human race? Will we enjoy the benefits of a next generation if we’re all turned off by a woman’s sex?

The author is blaming the world's disgust at Ms. Spears' lack of underwear on general repulsion of female genitalia, a typical feminist war-cry. Now don't get me wrong: I will be the first to whip off my bra and burn it the moment I get a whiff of sexism. However, this author implies that I am anti-female because I want the girl to put her knickers back on.

I am all for celebrating the female vulva. I have a copy of the Vulva Coloring book, which I obtained for a course in college. I am a huge believer in women celebrating the differences and uniqueness of their individual body types - and that includes what is between their legs.  I (obviously) have no issues with pornography and believe that sexuality should be celebrated.

I do not, however, believe that is an appropriate attitude to take at all situations.  I do not believe in viewing pornography with my seven-year-old stepdaughter. Nor do I believe in discussing the merits of sexual novelty items with my grandmother. In short:  there is an appropriate time and place for everything.  There is nothing wrong with Britney Spears celebrating her sexuality, however, for her to do so in public by willfully and continuously exposing herself is obscene, illegal, inappropriate..and anti-feministic.

Yes, I said anti-feministic. Like it or love it, Britney Spears is one of the most powerful economic forces in this country. She does photo shoots and the magazine sells. She does interviews, the country watches. She records records (as bad as they typically are), and the public buys them.  In short, she is a woman with power. And to condone her exposing her genitalia in order to gain cheap publicity does nothing but reduce her to prostitute status. Worse, actually:  prostitutes are paid for taking off their clothes whereas Britney is exposing herself for free.  How exactly is that fall into the feminist ideology?

In sum, I have to respectfully disagree that the world's reaction to Ms. Spears' antics have anything to do with general repulsion towards female genitalia and, hence, an anti-female viewpoint. It is not her naughty bits which are offensive, but the manner in which she has chosen to expose them. Common sense seems to prevail in this case: context is king, er, queen. It is too bad, however, when those so engrossed in their particular cause that they end up portraying their cause in an even more negative light.

 

December 4, 2006  

James Bond Is Hung Part II